WE PROMISE TO ONLY SEND YOU GOOD THINGS.

Winter is coming -- and so is Christmas. How do I cope? I drink and I know things. That's all I can do -- except maybe drink in my Santa hat and binge watch your favorite show.
Forget Merry Christmas. Forget Happy Holidays. Nevermind Feliz Navidad. Sh*tter was Full is the greeting of the season.
If you want to avoid being on the naughty list, listen to Mike Tyson. Be good for Thanta Clauth and he'll be good to you.
Nothing can put you into the winter holiday mood quite like The Shining. Let it snow, and snow, and snow -- You're never getting out of there.
A phrase that continues to echo through the ages. Where DO you think you're going to put that tree Griswold? Well, bend over and I'll show ya. #merrychristmas
There are some stories that need no words. The tongue-on-pole scene from a Christmas Story is one of those stories.
The chain of events after waking up the morning after a holiday rager. 1) Think to self "Hallelujah, I'm alive!" 2) Ask aloud to no one in particular "Where's the Tylenol?"
For when you're feeling jolly -- but also give zero Fs. Clark Griswold nails Christmas Spirit with one simple gesture.
Don't ever let anyone tell you that Die Hard isn't a Christmas movie. It's the ultimate Christmas movie. Yippee ki yay!
Hey girl. Feeling down about being single during the holidays? Don't worry. Ryan is here to wrap you in long sleeves made of boyfriend material.
Not big on Christmas? Feel meh about Hanukkah? Festivus is the holiday for the rest of us.
Ralphie, a Christmas legend and original supporter of the 2nd amendment. No matter what anyone told him -- "you'll shoot your eye out" they said! -- he persisted. The rest is a famous Story.
For those of us that enjoy the darker side of the holidays, Jack is here to say "Merry Christmas!" Perfect for Nightmare Before Christmas fans.
Sometimes you just can't be bothered to be jolly. Let this shirt help you muster up a "Merry Whatever" and be on your way.
You thought it was snowing outside, but it was really just a Bigge Holidaze. I plan to spend the whole season there.
All I want for Christmas is Channing. And now I can see him everyday with this shirt!
I'm asking Santa for truffles for Christmas -- the truffle shuffle! I think it's going to be a very Merry Chunkmas.
Bah-humbug. Grumpy has it right. Singing carols? Drinking cocoa? Spending time with family? It's the most terrible time of the year!
The stress of the holiday can make us all go a little psycho. Some of us are just better at hiding it than others.
They'll be no more trading places once you have this shirt. You'll want to keep it all to yourself!
This shirt is multifaceted. It covers two winter holidays. And reminds you of one of the best lines from a classic movie. You'll get a lot of mileage out of Merry New Year!!
Have yourself a very Murray Christmas! Treat yourself to this snazzy shirt.
The season of Festivus is upon us. Celebrate with this long sleeved tee for a Happy Festivus!
I just want someone to look at me the way Elf looks at Santa. At least people will look my way with this shirt -- Oh my god!! I know him!
Looks like it's going to be a McClane Christmas. Now I have a machine gun. Ho ho ho!!
A slogan that works all year round. A slogan that perfectly describes the men and women in the Air Force. Aim High! And get this shirt.
Every since the last season ended, I've been dreaming of the next. Dreaming of a White Walker Christmas! We might have to wait until 2019 for the real thing, but you can get this shirt today!  
You know nothing -- except that you need this shirt. Winter is coming. Let it Snow, Let it Snow, Let it Jon Snow!
Tis the season to be merry. So throw on this tee and channel your inner Griswold.
Make sure you wear this to any raging party this holiday season. Then when you wake up -- just point to your shirt. Someone will lead you to the tylenol.
This year has been sort of grim. But I'm introducing a new carol for this holiday season. It's called "Now I have a machine gun. Ho ho ho." Festive isn't it?
TEXAS PRIDE ON INSTAGRAM

WE PROMISE TO ONLY SEND YOU GOOD THINGS.

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